Monday, January 25, 2010

Love Is Spoken Here

That phrase is stuck in my head tonight.

The roses, are what I came home to Wednesday Night, in a long white box on my porch from "her". OMG...I needed it. I miss her terribly every day.

My kids, I had the best freaking day with my kids. We didn't do anything special. Small son had his friend over for a sleepover, so we did that...the boys woke up and played DS and Wii. I let them stay up as late as they wanted last night, providing that I didn't hear them. They were in sleeping bags on the living room floor. I figured what the heck, it's a sleep over, let them have fun. The mama in me had to stay up, awake in my room until they were asleep, but they didn't know that.

We had one of those wonderful home days that consist of a slow moving nothing day. Wake up, eat, hang out. We did home work, cuddled on the couch, watched "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs" for the 40th time, and did laundry. Ate dinner, did showers, and then they went to bed sleepy, happy and tired. Really what more does a mommy want? I haven't left my house since I got home from work on Friday. That is the beauty of shopping ahead. I wasn't out of anything at all, so I didn't need to leave. It was snowy, cold, and time to hole up with my cubs, and we did that with abandon. Little Miss spent the weekend dressed up as a "fairy"...she got a bunch of fairy costumes in a trunk for Christmas which she uses on a daily basis.

I helped Small Son make a UFO spaceship, complete with a green alien made out of a burst balloon with cotton balls and paper clip antenai, it looks rather cool if I do say so myself.

I had my weekly fight with Hubcap. I'm so done with him.

I decided I'm changing Realtors if I can get out of the contract...we will see.

Found a house online that I'm in love with, the only thing is that I would need to add a garage. But the price is so far within my comfort zone, that is a possibility. It's on an acre and a half, up in the woods, with a wood stove, rustic interior, and best of all, so the website says a "deep soaking tub"...score. Now to figure out how to sell my house faster.

"She" is coming this weekend, and I'm having a hard time waiting. This distance thing is getting harder by the farking minute. It's going well so far, and I spend nearly every night talking to her. She is an exceptional person, and I sometimes want to pinch myself to figure out how someone can be so kind to me. So understanding of me needing time, so willing to listen to my constant bitching. So willing to eat my casseroles, big joke because Hubcap wouldn't sink to eating a casserole. I'm thrilled that she likes the same kind of food I do.

I'm so happy with the way it's all going so far. Challenges ahead I'm sure. Now I just want to get past this marriage, past the house, and onto the real life I know awaits me. Each day, I'm more sure I don't want to be with Hubcap, and that I saved by my kids and myself by leaving. He is so angry, so wrapped up in his own misery.

Today though, is a happy birthday, it's my Dad's 80th Birthday. I hope my daddy knows that I'm thinking about him today.



Avril Fleur said...

Glad to hear that you had a good weekend and that things are going your way! You deserve all good things coming your way!

lesbo said...

flowers make a girl's heart happy, don't they?
ESPECIALLY when they come at just the right time.

your weekend sounds amazing!

Camlin said...

warning: if you buy that house in the country, I'm moving in...or at least coming to visit!

C said...

its SO nice to feel your happiness through your words... my god it's about time, sistah! a year ago you were in a darkness over at your udder blog... lookie how far you've come!

be proud!

be loud!

be queer!

no fear!